Daily Prompt: Breakdown

Tell us about a habit you’d like to break. Is there any way it can play a positive role in your life?



Picture borrowed from: http://thenyfrenchhypnosiscenter.com/images/quit-smoking-for-good2.jpg Copyright remains that of the original owner.
Picture borrowed from:
Copyright remains that of the original owner.

For those who don’t know me, I am a smoker.  I have been smoking for many, many years.  Before I moved to Texas, I was smoking close to three packs per day.  It was getting really bad.

When I moved here, I made the conscious decision to only smoke outside.  That was probably the single most important decision I have made in my life in recent years.  I’ve tried to quit before, but to no avail.  I’ve done the cold-turkey thing, only to become so dizzy that I very nearly passed out.  I’ve tried the patch, the medicine and the gum.  I’ve even tried the electronic cigarettes.  None of these worked for me.

Now I smoke less than a pack per day usually.  I’m hoping that I may get to the point where I can quit entirely.

I’m sure that many of you have your own ideas on this matter, and they are probably very well-intentioned, but I am going to stop you before you even begin.

  1. Obviously cold turkey isn’t a safe option for me.  If I was to try it again and am driving 70 mph down the road when my body decides to pass out, I could kill myself, my children and anyone else who just happens to be on the road at the time.
  2. I can’t use the patch or the medicine because I had a heart attack when I was 28 years old that was caused by a different medication that I was on at the time.
  3. The gum literally burns my throat when I chew it, so I’m certain that there would be permanent damage if I continued to try that method.
  4. The electronic cigarettes really just didn’t do anything for me other than make me want to have a real cigarette (although I will hold that as an option if I ever manage to quit entirely to help with the habit of simply having something in my hand).

I would also like to mention that every person is different.  Please don’t assume that simply because something may have worked for you or for someone you know that it would work for everyone.  For me, I was addicted to cigarettes the moment I first inhaled one.  For other people, they are what I call “social smokers”.  They only want a cigarette when they are drinking, for instance.  Or there are those who simply only smoke a few cigarettes a day.  I also know some people who only smoke when they are seriously stressed out about something.  There are all types of smokers, just like there are all types of people in the world.

If you want to let someone know what worked for you or for someone you know, that’s great.  It might give them an idea that they haven’t tried before.  But don’t assume that it will be so easy for them.  I seriously hate the statement “Well, just quit!”  That’s the equivalent of saying, “Just stop breathing.”  It’s not that simple.  At least not for everybody.  Be respectful.

I want to quit.  I have a few reasons to.  It would save me a ton of money.  It will improve my health in so many ways.  It will allow me to be around for my children much longer than I would if I didn’t quit.  It will give me a quality of life that would let me enjoy my years with them.

But, if I quit, it will have to be in my own time, in my own way.


Inspired by:  Daily Prompt:  Breakdown


I am a 43-year-old, single mom of 19-year-old boy/girl twins living in an extremely small town in rural Texas. Currently, I am employed as a Site Supervisor for a prominent corporation that provides security officers for homes and businesses.

12 thoughts on “Daily Prompt: Breakdown

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  2. You are absolutely right about it having to be in your own time.

    My dad smoked for 37 years. We don’t know why he decided to quit. He’d tried in the past using the patch, gum, e-cigarettes, and even hypnosis, but nothing worked. He had a heart attack at age 41 and was told that he’d die withing years if he didn’t stop. Yet he couldn’t manage it for another 15 years. I know what finally helped him succeed and I have guesses about what “allowed” that method to be successful, but that’s not the point.

    I know that your kids will be overjoyed when you are able to quit, and I sincerely hope you are successful some day. In the meantime, though, keep the attitude you have. It’s your battle to fight, can’t be fought by anyone else, and will be fought on your timeline — no one else’s.

    Good for you.

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